Relinquished from its duties
My heart halts
Jolting every muscle
Shocking my chest
Spreading a siren of disbelief
Up into my eyes
Placing pressure
Just enough to start a cascade
fuck
My mind can be a bit omnivorous
Feeding on the lies embedded within the truth
Orchestrating a sequence of notes
Eventually to be placed on an iron skillet
Slowly burning every shred of unconscious love
But the love was real
The dream was a deception
Fingers that seem to climb
Up the staircase of your
Beautifully arched back
Only to wrap themselves around your perfectly
Bruised neck
For the pain that subsides in you right eye
Only to be exacerbated in the left
From a pile of diamonds wrapped around her ring fingers
A scar in the shade of a decaying rose
As the last petal falls into your broken arms
Shaking to lift your skin
From a bed of vile love your mother laid out
For you to sleep on
The pain will never cease to exist
And he was for me
His breath took my last away
A natural stop
…
It was by the lake
On a cold brisk winter’s day
Ours eyes stood straight on
Mesmerized once
My surrounding ceased to be
Noting only you
My heartbeat steadied
And I fell into pure bliss
Hoping to stay still
Convinced life was ok
Worth the strain on my weak lips
Quite pleasurable
Passion is hidden
Along a path to sorrow
Just take a moment
Let me breath the air of the wealthy
Just for the square bottles of Fiji
Jumping off a bridge so close to hitting the ground
You feel the dots on your arm rip your skin off
Flying so close the perimeter of the atmosphere
You can sense the decay of your lungs
Let the trumpets play as I dance like
A wild maniac with a coat of salt on the upper lip
The same on the rim left in the back left corner
From the last I had to drink as a 16 year old
Let me take my last shot on top of the
Hospital building and accidently
Step off to the conveniently placed stretcher
10 floors below
Hoping everything has been done and the announcement of my passing steadies my dying father’s heart murmur
Sleep to the wind the hummingbird exhales
From what can only be
Thought of as chimes
Hope for the present to never take away your voice
To never confront you with a blade to your jugular
Pray your senses encapsulate your very being
Into a state of utter disparity and silence
Forever close your mouth
To anyone whose eyes glisten with the desire to
Take it all away
It’s not worth it
For the only way to truly move on with your life
Is to accept what has already been done
And hope what is left is enough to move on
And if it’s too hard
Wish for a meteor to strike
That will end all of what is in front of you
And then some more.
Sonder 